Brother

I recently completed a questionnaire about myself. One of the questions was: What would be the title of your biography? 

I responded “Big Brother, Little Brother, Always A Brother.” 
This does indeed best capture my life story in a title.

This past March marked 41 years since I became a big brother. I have always loved being a big brother. There is a sense of responsibility, protection and purpose in this role. I am a big brother to three siblings and I do not take this role lightly, just ask any of them. There have been times where fulfilled my role well and other times I didn’t step up to the plate to guide well or defend their name the way I should have. Still I remained a big brother.

Being a big brother can also leave one in a vulnerable state. In several situations all eyes can easily turn to you to have answers and the right words. I know that this didn’t always pan out well for me, but I tried to hold the delicate position of big brother with dignity, especially the dignity of the sibling. I have had to ask for clarification and forgiveness from my siblings and they have (for the most part) readily given it. Growing up my interests were very different from my two brothers and my protective instincts for my baby sister still run pretty high. It was in being relationship with these three that I first learned about the depths of my strength, the ways that worked for me, the power of love, the need to own up to wrongs, the joy of community, the safety of heart strings being pulled, the honesty in fighting words, the importance in letting go of grudges and the value of God-given gifts shared. It is in the gift of being a big brother that prepared me for being a little brother.

So how does one who is a big brother become a little brother? Well in my case it happened when I joined the Order of Friars Minor or Franciscans. The word Friars is based on a translation of the French word Frère which means brother While minor obviously means lesser or little. When one joins the Franciscans, they become a lesser or little brother. I am ever grateful for my three siblings, because of them I have been able to embrace this role as little brother. Being a lesser or little brother has new demands and challenges. In the 5 years I have been a Friar I have learned about lesser/little in a variety of ways from board games to chores, from community discussions to meals. Being little is about surrender and trust; knowing that my lowliness is engulfed in God’s grandeur of love. Being little means that I strive for brotherhood with the Friars I live with and the whole of our order. Differences do arise and perspectives do vary but being a Friar calls me first and foremost to be brother. Being a lesser brother doesn’t mean I am a doormat; it does however mean I must look beyond my view and see the view of the one I stand side by side with as a brother. Being a lesser brother continually calls me to reflect on what I have, what I offer, how I build community, what I need and don’t need and how this calls me beyond myself and the safety of our fraternity. Being a little brother challenges me to always be a brother.

By always being a brother, I must look with eyes that don’t see projected images or media-given stereotypes. I must see the person before me created in the image and likeness of God. I must be willing to embrace the other and acknowledge and celebrate their value. I must be willing to walk along side and listen in good times and in bad, in joys and sorrows. I must be willing to be vulnerable; trusting and surrendering into God so as to be a space for the siblings of the world to encounter Divine Love. 

Always a brother began those 41 years ago when I very excitedly welcomed my brother, it grew a bit more when the second brother joined us and we were a perfect trio of uniqueness. When my sister came into the picture my brother skills were stepped up a notch. Over the years I have been blessed with amazing people in my life and some pretty amazing friends who have been as close to me as siblings. There is a small group of men I’m thinking of who have expanded my comprehension about brotherly love and there is a small group of women who have established themselves as sisters in my life. I am in awe by lessons learned and the risks I have taken to be a brother because of my blood siblings and these friend siblings. 

As I reflect on the journey and consider the lives of families I have been invited into and the families I have ministered with the word brother takes on a greater depth again. The tables I have sat around being part of the family, the children I have seen grow into young adults and the pains and rejoicing I have been honored to hold are the gifts this dimension of brotherhood has offered. My role of big brother has expanded and now it comes with the lessons of being a little brother. 

As I consider how my life has shifted, grown and has been challenged since I accepted the call of being a Friar Minor, brotherhood continues to expand and open me up to listening to God’s grand designs. My life as a Franciscan is never dull and it has its challenges however it always seems to bring the perspective of brother into view very quickly. It is from the journey of life so far that I choose again on this Religious Brothers Day (May 1) to commit myself as a Big Brother, Little Brother, Always a Brother. It is with a grateful and awe-filled heart that I say thank you to those who have helped shape me as a brother. 


Non-ordained Religious Brothers from all walks of life and religious communities the world over do so many different tasks and share their gifts with communities, families and churches in unique ways. I humbly ask you to pray for us today on May 1 that we may continue to respond well in being a brother for the people of God.

Easter Emmaus Encounter

This past week has been a tough week for us in here in Canada. Not only do we continue to deal with the COVID-19 pandemic we also were dealt the blow of home-grown terror with the killings in Nova Scotia. These two very different events have impacted us and have caused grief to settle in again in profound and unusual ways. As we continue to move forward each day of this pandemic and as we offer support and prayers for Nova Scotia and the families directly affected, I offer a reflection based on the Easter Emmaus Encounter.

An Emmaus Examination of Living for the Now

The Emmaus Road gospel story which is found in Luke 24: 13 – 35. It has much to ponder and offers us insights and a way to examen our living not only in this time of pandemic and sorrow but also in our “regular everyday” lives. There are several lines which jumped off the page for me, which caused me to sit with this gospel and let its wisdom penetrate my life. It is in examining our lives where we can then see steps forward and again give thanks and praise.

“talking with each other about all these things that had happened…”

We do a lot of talking in our life and now during the pandemic restrictions maybe even more so and in new social media and socially acceptable ways. We are talking a lot about what has and is happening; this is exhausting. I have had to ask myself: am I talking about anything that is life-giving, stirring my heart, calling me to be quiet instead of yakking about what everyone else is talking about to make myself feel okay? When I’m talking with people, I am being a voice which is kind, a voice of comfort, a voice of hope? Am I telling those closest to me how much I love them or I am waiting for another moment when we are talking about something else or another tragedy hits “closer” to home?

“their eyes were kept from recognizing him…”

I wonder how true this has been for me in the last few weeks? Have my eyes been blinded to how Christ is present and how he is speaking to me? What truths are arising? What uncomfortable realities am I facing?

“handed him over to be condemned to death and crucified him…”

What has died in me?

What has been crucified again now?

Have I been condemning to death?

What have I grieved because of this time which feels like crucifixion not resurrection?

These are uneasy questions to ask and yet I have been able answer them for my own journey. How am I serving, my own darkness, what steps forward, the coldness of murder, in trying to be strong, as a coping mechanism, freedoms, lack of human contact, relationships changing again, and not being able to gather in the larger community for Eucharist all come to mind for my answers.

“they had indeed seen a vision of Angels who said that he was alive…”

This is a little nugget of hope. I hold on to the last three words. They serve as a reminder that resurrection is stronger than death and darkness and is always possible and at work.

“how slow of heart to believe…”

Yes! My slowness of heart, has been where I like to sit and wallow, this place of contentment in misery, this place of why and why not, this place of “I can see the big picture but it’s blurry and so very slowly coming into focus.”

And yet this place is a fleeting moment because I come back to “he is alive!” I know this slowness of heart is about transformation and being opened up to more and about depth and honesty and freedom.

Where has my slowness of heart surfaced in the last few days?

What does transformation feel like to me today?

“they urged him strongly, saying, “stay with us”…”

Yes Lord, stay with us! In this place here and now, in this reality and in our deep sorrow, in the shifting into a new normal, in the letting go of what has become normal in this time, in our hopes shattered and yet in our hope, in our fears, dreams, plans, prayers, whispers and pleas… stay with us.

“he took bread, blessed and broke it, and gave it to them… their eyes were opened and they recognized him…”

Where have I been recognizing the Risen Lord at work in these past few weeks?

How has bread been blessed and broken for me? Maybe I have been blessing and breaking it for others?

What has been nourishing me?

What has broken me? And what has broken me so I can again rise to new life and see with new eyes?

Am I recognizing the blessings in and among the trials of these uncertain and yet familiar times? In the stories and heartache shared?

Bread – nourishment – meals shared – messages sent – a board game played – a video enjoyed – a front step delivery left – yes, nourishment – bread for the body and soul.

Blessed – holy – gift – grace – simple – appreciated – needed – present among us.

Broken – for me, for you, for all, for life, for newness.

Given – for me, for you, for all, for life, for newness.

Opened – to begin again, freshness, aware, depth, freedom, again and again.

“The Lord is risen indeed… made known in the breaking of the bread.”

Yes! Indeed, our Risen Lord is present. He is our strength, courage and hope. The words of our prayers carried in his once broken now glorified body. Our struggles and longings, our tiredness and aches, our yearning and anguish continually held in the glorious light of his Risen body – all of us – his body – blessed – broken – given. Together as one, together we are stronger, together we walk our path of life which is the path of the Resurrection Day. We are raised up, we see again, we know our Savior in the breaking of the bread.

How do I need to break bread today so the Risen Lord may be made known? 

with who? for who?

Can I do this with hope and trust?

Risen Lord,

you are indeed with us,

when we forget this

you gently awaken our slow hearts

and let the yeast of goodness take hold

and transform us.

As we continue on in these days,

facing new realities, letting go of plans,

feeling sorrow, talking and walking

lost at times in a cloud of unknowing

walk with us,

open our minds and hearts

to the depth of your love and the promise

you made that you are with us always.

And Risen Lord

as we sit down to table to share in a meal

help us to be aware that you dine with us,

you break bread with us,

for you are our nourishment now,

and in the Eucharist

and at the eternal banquet.

Amen.

 Emmaus

Stay with us

let us dine

stories shared

enjoying and feasting.

Bread broken

it is the Lord

made known to us

our hearts alive.

Our lives transformed

hope abounds

good news indeed

He is Risen.

Our hearts on fire

we must share more

our mission inflamed

joy and courage as gift.

In word

in deeds

in broken bread

Christ is made known.

Easter: The Upper Room

        

        The Upper Room of Easter has often intrigued me. What was like to be huddled together? What was going through the minds of the clan which were together? Were they sharing stories? Lost in grief? Hopefully holding onto words from the past? Were they praying? Were they quiet? Were they tired of each other? 
Then I paused for a moment and said, “Wait a minute? Is this not our situation right now with the pandemic?” We too our huddled in our “upper rooms” with thoughts and prayers and frustrations and worries and exhaustion and hopes containing us. We really aren’t much different from the disciples on that first Easter morning as we wait for the word that will “set us free” from our captivity.
What will that word be?

Work.
Party.
Vacation.
Paycheck.
Road trip.
Church.
Family.

Peace.

“Jesus came and stood among them and said, “Peace be with you.”  
- John 20.19 

Peace be with you. A simple phrase we often take for granted. A simple phrase that we often mumble out at church. A simple phrase which transformed the containment and the grief of the disciples into joy and filled them with the gifts of the Holy Spirit. Can we let this phrase, this prayer, this promise transform us? 

Are we willing to let the power of the peace of Christ penetrate the upper rooms of our isolation? Our places of fear and loneliness that we have come to know well over these last weeks? Our letting go of what was and our worries about the future? It is not easy to do; it is much easier to brush aside this gift of peace and stay contained by what now feels comfortable even if it is an uneasy comfort. 

Over the course of this past week peace has come and gone in my days. Worry has sometimes been very ripe and obscuring the joy of peace. Distractions have been easier to deal with then the transformation that peace offers. Doubt, like that of Thomas, has very slowly strolled through my mind leaving me stuck in the mud of it. I have had to ask my self: where I am finding peace; this peace which the Risen Christ has promised me?

It is in forcing myself to pause and realize that besides hand-washing and proper public health precautions none of this in my hands. It is stopping each day to acknowledge that the day will come and go and I too will move through the day. It is being quiet enough in prayer which allows me to go to the upper room of my heart and remember that transformation is happening there. It is in the gift of music which lifts my soul. It is in the power of movement – pounding my feet into the earth as I walk – releasing from within me the burdens I carry. This is where I am finding the peace. It is arising in me, it is the peace in simply being, sitting in the upper room and being okay that this is where I am to be for now. For I know that I to will be sent again (and maybe even in new and different ways (hmm… again sounds like the disciples)) and what will I need to carry with me? 

Peace. 

Our world needs me now to be and will need me and all of us to be bearers of peace with each step into transformed, new realities. How can we foster that peace in this time of being in our upper rooms? Are we willing to be transformed or do we just want back our old ways? Our we willing to risk the peace of simply being? For as Thich Nhat Hanh says: “Our time is first of all for us to be. To be what? To be alive, to be peaceful, to be joyful, to be loving. And that is what the word needs most.” Yes, this is indeed what our world needs for this is the work of “Peace be with you” now in our upper rooms and when these doors are flung open.

My Lord and My God,

fill me with the promise of the Resurrection,

that the peace you give and breathe into me

may transform my heart now

as I dwell in my own upper room

so I may carry this peace with me 

into our fragile world.

Amen.

Where are you finding peace? 

Easter Peace to bless you.

Meal Blessing for Easter

I have long been leading the Blessing Before Meals in our family. Long before I joined the Friars I was writing these prayers or crafting ones from the lines of good pray-ers for all types of celebrations. I continue to this day to write the Blessing Before Meals for my family for major celebrations. 

This year my parents asked me to write one for our family as we will not be able to be together during this time of pandemic. Below is the blessing I wrote. My parents included it in the Easter Baskets they were dropping off at each of my siblings homes. It is the prayer we will each pray before our Easter Feast tomorrow. I offer it to you as a gift from our family, for Easter Sunday and the Easter Season.

Christ is Risen! Alleluia!
Indeed He is Risen! Alleluia! Alleluia!

God of Life,
As we gather to celebrate 
the great feast of Easter,
the feast of your love for all people 
and all of creation,
we give you thanks and praise for the
life of your son Jesus, our Risen Savior.

The challenges we face this year because 
of the world wide pandemic reminds us
that we do have much to be thankful for 
and still have much to celebrate.

We ask your blessing upon 
those who are suffering this day, 
those who are alone and have no way to celebrate,
those who are homeless and hungry,
and those who will die this day.

We ask your blessing upon
our family and all families 
– spread out among various homes and countries.
We ask your blessing upon
our home and all homes
– may they be safe and healthy places.
We ask your blessing upon
our Easter Feast and all who laboured to 
bring this food to our table
– may it nourish us and fill us, 
reminding us that hope never dies and that love is here 
just like when the tomb was discovered empty 
on that first Easter Morning.

We ask this all in the name of Jesus – your Son,
risen from the dead, who lives for ever and ever.
Amen.

Easter: Stepping Into the Resurrection

 

Early on the first day of the week, while it was still dark, 

Mary Magdalene came to the tomb…

Mary Magdalene stood weeping outside the tomb…

“Why are you weeping?”…

“Sir if you have carried him away, tell me where you have laid him…”

Jesus said to her, “Mary!”

She turned and said to him… “Rabbouni!”

“Go to my brothers and say to them,

“I am ascending to my Father and your Father, to my God and your God.”

Mary Magdalene went and announced to the disciples, “I have seen the Lord.” 

- John 20-1-18 adapted

Each year at Easter we must pause and say thank goodness for the witness of Mary Magdalene. As the Apostle to the Apostles she helps us find our footing so we can step into life on this side of the cross and resurrection.  Saint Mary Magdalene… pray for us.

  

Alone

weeping at the tomb

all I have lost

all I am surrendering

all I must release.

Alone

weeping at the tomb

lost in my misery

lost in my sorrow

lost in my ways.

My name

I hear my name called

with love

with purpose

with mercy.

My name

I hear my name called

I am awakened

I am set free

I am renewed.

Announce

the good news

that Christ is Risen

that Love never dies

that God is our home.

Announce

the good news

that I have seen the Lord

that I know our God lives

that I know hope is ours.

Live

into this Resurrection time

for the cross has brought life

for the tomb is empty

for we must rejoice.

Live

into this Resurrection time

with words of kindness

with actions of kindness

with purpose and kindness.

Resurrection

the way, the truth and the life

not just one Sunday morning

not just for Mary to see

not just for a great story ending.

Resurrection

the way, the truth and the life

in each of our days

in these tiring and trying times

in the living out of the gospel.

We too come to the tomb with Mary.

Can we hear our name called?

Will we respond in love and action?

Where do see the Risen Lord today?

Easter Blessings… the Resurrection calls us to life.

How will you live out this blessing this week 

and during the Easter Season?

Then and Now

                                                  a poem for Easter 2020                                                          

The sun cascades across the barren park,

the swings no longer move to and fro,

the steps locked up,

the slides sealed shut,

passersby look on and wonder.

The sun cascades across the barren garden,

the flowers frozen in this time,

the paths are still,

the tomb securely sealed,

passersby look on and wonder.

Is this how this is to be?

Is this how it is to turn out?

Is there not more?

Is there not something missing?

Why have you forsaken us?

Hope lives on in new ways,

patience is a virtue they say,

in slowing down truths are revealed,

isolation causes much to ponder,

as we look on and wonder.

Hope lives on, so they were told,

their dreams forsaken and broken,

hiding now in upper rooms,

left with much to ponder,

as they look on and wonder.

Is this all there is?

Is this all there is to be?

Is there truth in what we’ve seen?

Is there more to tell?

Why don’t we know what to do?

The sun breaks through the mourning fog,

yet a new day dawns it’s true,

the same again, it seems to be,

and yet we know it’s best for now,

we look within and wonder.

The sun breaks through the morning fog,

it is the same and yet it’s not,

yet we know there is more,

love prevails then and now,

for our Savior died but He is Risen,

we look within and beyond in wonder.

Triduum: A Kyrie Litany

Kyrie Eleison – Lord have mercy

Very often when we hear Kyrie eleison or Lord have mercy we often think of forgiveness and pardon. This is true and very good but is only one aspect of mercy. God’s mercy can be defined as “loving care from God for all creation.” Yes, this evokes the ideas of forgiveness and pardon but there is more to it. The Hebrew word for mercy has three definitions – which means: “goodness, womb (compassion) and grace.” These are powerful words which evoke images of deep forgiveness and also the inherent depth of God’s mercy seen in goodness, compassion and grace.

When we consider mercy as goodness, hopefully we can call to mind the goodness we have experienced in our life, the very fact we are created in the image of God which is good and the bonds of goodness we have with so many people. When we ponder mercy as womb, we can see it as the very place of life, the sacred place which holds us and first introduces us to compassion and tenderness. When we look at mercy as grace, we are reminded of God’s gift of free love to us; God willingly bestowing upon us generous love and passion for us. It is with these thoughts that I offer a Kyrie Litany for Triduum 2020 as we enter into these holy days in a very unprecedented time. God's mercy is indeed present as God's goodness, compassion and grace give shape to the days of Triduum.

For those of us who are struggling with the fact that we will not be in churches to celebrate these three sacred days and then gathering with family, let us be mindful of the hundreds of thousands of Christians who for many years have had to worship in secret or alone due to persecution. Let us be mindful of the hundreds of homeless and poor who do not feel they can walk through the doors of our church ever. The Body of Christ is still the Body of Christ broken and hurting but always with eyes fixed on the Resurrection.

For the times we have failed each other or failed to notice each other may this mercy be upon us. For the times in which goodness, compassion and grace have blessed us may we respond in mercy. For these times may mercy comfort us.

Lord have mercy.

Christ have mercy.

Lord have mercy.

Lord have mercy

                on the peoples of the world

                on the nations of the world

                on the whole of creation

Christ have mercy

                on the lonely

                on the broken

                on the hurting

Lord have mercy

                on the homeless

                on the hungry

                on the abandoned

Christ have mercy

                on the sick

                on the dying

                on the dead

Lord have mercy

                on those working for the common good

                on those working for justice

                on those working for peace

Christ have mercy

                on health care teams

                on emergency workers

                on medical specialists

                                                               

Lord have mercy

                on farmers and food providers

                on food banks and soup kitchens

                on postal workers, delivery drivers and packers

                                                               

Christ have mercy

                on those caught in violence

                on those caught in addictions

                on those caught in war

Lord have mercy

                on refugees

                on migrants

                on forgotten peoples

Christ have mercy

                on elders and the elderly

                on babies and infants

                on children and teens

Lord have mercy

                on single parents

                on married couples

                on widows and widowers

Christ have mercy

                on young professionals

                on those nearing retirement

                on minimum wage earners

Lord have mercy

                on grocery store clerks and stocking staff

                on pharmacists, drug store staffs and lab technicians

                on restaurant owners and servers

Christ have mercy

                on those alone in isolation

                on those with special needs and their care givers

                on those in hospital and those having treatments

Lord have mercy

                on those who must work for the good of all

                on those working long hours

                on those who need work

Christ have mercy

                on police officers

                on military personnel

                on firefighters

                                               

Lord have mercy

                on teachers, instructors and administrators

                on support staffs and janitors

                on students

Christ have mercy

                on daycare staffs and care aides

                on town maintenance crews

                on gardeners and florists

Lord have mercy

                on those working to provide power

                on those working to provide electricity

                on those working to provide water to our homes

Christ have mercy

                on pilots and airline crews

                on construction workers

                on therapists and mental health advocates

Lord have mercy

                on pastors, ministers and priests

                on rabbis

                on imams

                                 and their congregations

Christ have mercy

                on volunteers

                on neighbours

                on generous donors

Lord have mercy

                on small business owners

                on managers

                on the self-employed and employers

Christ have mercy

                on those who work with online technology

                on those working in and for social media

                on those working in medical technologies

Lord have mercy

                on cooks and bakers

                on cleaners and those sanitizing

                on dishwashers and food services teams

Christ have mercy

                on couples preparing for marriage

                on families preparing for the birth of a child

                on children waiting for adoption

Lord have mercy

                on seniors in assisted living homes

                on those dealing with natural disasters

                on families separated because of hurts

Christ have mercy

                on families of all sizes

                on communities of all sizes

                on cities, towns and villages

Lord have mercy

                on governments

                on leaders of nations and lands

                on leaders of communities and peoples

Christ have mercy

                on…

                on…

                on…

Lord have mercy

                on my community and neighbourhood

                on my family

                on me.

Lord have mercy

Christ have mercy

Lord have mercy

Your love is our strength.

Your presence among us our hope.

Your way is our peace.

Our faith is weak,

our ways are feeble,

our work is stumbling,

yet

You are our strength,

You are our hope,

You are our peace.

Your mercy is goodness.

Your mercy is compassion.

Your mercy is grace.

God of Mercy,

we know you are here with us

during these holy days

and through this pandemic.

We are tired and weak,

we are bombarded with a lot,

we are trying our best,

we are learning to slow down,

we are listening more closely to our hearts,

we are working at being more humane,

we are trying to learn, to hear and to be.

Lord, 

fill us with your mercy today, 

these days and always.

Amen.

            

   

Blessings of peace to you as we journey                                                                       to the Last Supper, to the cross, to the sealed tomb                                                            and to the empty tomb.