Cut Down Trees, Jail And My Heart

My parents would confirm that as a child I had a very sensitive heart. Maybe better described as a thoughtful or compassionate heart. I had a heart that was concerned for others both human and creation. I was their child who wanted to have a funeral for the trees we cut down in the yard. I was the child who made sure that my sister’s dolls had their clothes on before they went into the cupboard. I was the child who would sit in front our fish tank and try and make the fish smile because they looked sad. I was the child who made sure even the smallest piece of paper was recycled. Little did I know that my compassionate heart then would help shape me into who I am now and that it was the start of my Franciscan journey.

I thought of that last night as I journeyed home from my first experience of prison ministry. I really didn’t think that I was going to enjoy or want to be there, but by the end of the night, my heart had been opened up again and I do want to go back. This heart of mine seems to connect with the heart of others and that became obvious again last night.

I think I was worried about going because I thought I would want to make everything okay or better for the inmates. That never became the case at all, my heart opened up and I simply listened and shared. I was welcomed into a sacred space and it was simply having ‘coffee’ and then praying with the community gathered.

The scripture for the day was the prodigal son and as is the tradition there, the scripture was proclaimed by each person reading a line. 30 voices proclaimed the Word of God. The shared reflection that followed was amazing. Insights from both inmates and volunteers deepened my experience of the prodigal son and God’s love and mercy. Sitting around this circle with my brothers and sisters my heart was filled up and I saw a whole new side of our awesome God. 

I also realized that over the past few years my compassionate heart had being playing it safe, maybe even guarded. Not that I wasn’t still using it but maybe just not to its fullest (like when I was a child). As this Franciscan journey continues I am excited about the possibilities that this new openness in my heart will lead me to discover about God, my neighbours and myself. As the sayings go ‘Love Serves’ and ‘I Am Third’. May my God always be first, my neighbor second and myself third as I seek to journey deeper in faith. Francis definitely is influencing this path. I think I am beginning to understand his compassionate heart more and more.

I pray in thanksgiving for the gift of my compassionate heart and for the God experience to continue to shape it and open me up. It really is amazing what cut down trees and visiting a jail can do to someone!