It's Still All Good!

They that hope in the Lord will renew their strength,

they will soar as with eagles’ wings;

they will run and not grow weary,

walk and not grow faint.

-          Isaiah 40.31

 

These are the words from scripture at Evening Prayer tonight. They seem to best describe my last month of waiting. The past several weeks have been challenging at times, but have been graced filled and blessed as well.

I have indeed hoped in the Lord, and kept that hope, even on the days when it felt like I would never get to the Novitiate House.

I have soared with times of prayer, quiet, walks, journaling, serving, dialoguing with my Brothers here and at the Novitiate and with our staff.

I have run with a focus on Christ, this focus has helped me to keep calm, to be patient, to trust, and to discover the joys and blessings of this detour.

I have walked and not grown faint, my doubts have been conquered by Christ’s peace, the  overwhelming support and love of family, friends and brothers, and an openness to the journey even with a bit of an unpredicted start.

 

A thought from the reflections of Saint Francis:

Christ will be exalted through me, for to me life means Christ!

These are words that I root my journey and hope in, yes Christ indeed is my life.

 

 

A month ago I said…

It’s All Good!

And indeed it is!

By Saturday morning I will be settled into the Novitiate House and becoming familiar with routines, schedules, and life with my 14 Brothers and 4 Directors. My Visa has been approved and flights are booked.

I humbly ask for your prayers in these months ahead. Please also pray for my Brother Novices, our Directors and the Franciscans in Canada and the USA.

 

Thank you for journeying with me on this blog.

So I say for the second time… My blog will be silent now until August 2015 as I enter into my Novitiate Year and enter more fully into this Franciscan journey.

It’s All Good!

For God is Good and God's Goodness is ours to behold.

In the Waiting I Pray

Stevie’s Prayer

Hello Jesus My Friend,

Jesus, I would like to be able to run and play with the other kids,

But since you have other plans for me, I choose your plan today.

Jesus, for others who hurt you today by saying bad things,

Use my silent mouth to make up for the way they hurt you.

Jesus, for those who listened to things today that made you sad,

I heard a bird sing to make you glad.

 

Jesus, for those who use their hands or feet to hurt others,

You can use my hands and feet to be a blessing for others.

 

Jesus, for all families that don’t love each other,

I give you my family to show them how to love.

 

Come Jesus, to think in my mind, to circulate in my blood,

To breathe in my breathing, to beat in my heart.

 

Come Jesus, you live in me and let me live in you.

Jesus, I Love You.

Amen.

 

Prayer is a common part of my every day. I have specific times that I join our community for prayer, times that I pray on my own, times we gather for Eucharist and certain prayers that I have found and pray at different points in my day.

There is the Prayer to St. Michael that I end each day with, the Angel of God is my final words as I drift off to sleep, my morning prayer are words from Mother Teresa, my prayer to help me enter into the day is a stewardship prayer and a prayer to the Holy Spirit. Not to mention the German Prayer I pray at various times, the Prayer of St. Francis before the crucifix that calls me to trust in this journey and there is the prayer that calls me to keep my focus on serving in the name of Jesus.

I have always been fascinated by prayers and the way prayers are shaped and what they are saying. Some have the right words for those times of sorrow or hurting, others have words for rejoicing andgiving thanks and still others have the right words for the journey of the day. There are thousands upon thousands of printed prayers. People simply trying to express their relationship with God. I know my journals are full of my own prayers, and I have a journal that I keep prayers in that I have found that speak to me.

Over my time of waiting to join my Brothers at the Novitiate, prayer continues to fill me with strength and patience. Certain words on certain days pop out, on other days a specific prayer causes me to smile and reminds me that Jesus is present and God does know what is on my heart. I am appreciating the gift of prayer: spoken prayer, quite meditation, private prayer and communal prayer. Our calling out to God is personal and intimate and yet communal and public as we are members of the Body of Christ.

Last night before I went to bed I was reading a book of prayers. Stevie’s Prayer at the beginning of this blog was one I found. Wow! What a beautiful prayer, written by a young teenager who suffered from cerebral palsy. (I believe he passed away a few years ago at the age of 15.) Stevie added voice to my own daily prayer to be a living icon and living tabernacle of Christ. His words touched my depth and I wanted to share the gift of his words for your journey. His prayer reminded me to trust in God, to call to my mind my actions and the words of the day, and to not be afraid to call out to Jesus and offer my all in his name.

 

Jesus, I am continually yours, pray in and through me.

This day is yours, I walk with you.

Thank you for loving me and calling me to share my life as I trust in you.

Let us never be afraid to voice our prayers to our loving God.

Know of my continued prayers for you.

 

Update:

I'm still in Canada, my paper work is all in the hands of the Consulate and in final processing. Let's hope they can process quickly this week and everything will be in my hands.

 

Today marks 1 month since I unofficially entered the Novitiate (or tried to get there).

August 15 was the day that our Novitiate Year officially began, mine technically is August 19. 

 

My Novice Brothers are all doing well and I see them everyday on Skype during our community sessions. We are in the process of sharing our stories and learning about our personalities and strengths.

 

Please continue to pray for us. 

With Hope Filled Eyes

What the last few weeks have taught me about is hope. Hope is always present, we may not always be able to recognize it or its gifts but still it is here.

Over the past few weeks as I have been waiting to join my Brothers at the Novitiate it is hope that has been my outlook. Not false hope, but hope in the Lord. These weeks have been a grace-filled time.

I have been able to enter into deep prayer and foster a solitude time that is part of our Franciscan charism.

I have been able to serve (also a Franciscan charism) at our Retreat Center, helping both my Brothers and our staff, which has helped me appreciate the gift of this place and good people. It has also fanned the flame of my desire to do retreat work.

I have been able to enjoy a flexible schedule which will not exist to the same freedom when I finally join my Novice Brothers for the year.
I have also been able to enjoy the support of family and friends in a generous way with unexpected communication and conversations.

All signs of Hope, all signs of God at work in the journey, all signs of God knowing what I needed to make this transition into the intensity of the Novitiate Year. Hope has indeed filled these days. It is with hope that I look ahead, as paper work has been submitted and within a few days I should have a plane ticket in my hand and be where I am to be next. If for some reason that is not the case, I will still continue to be filled with hope.

 

The morning sunrise, a grand tree,

one more bloom, a gentle breeze,

reminds us all, both great and small

of God’s amazing and generous deeds.

 

Called to love brother and sister,

called to share, called to be,

witnesses for each day,

helping those bound to be set free.

 

Generous people fill the journey,

helping me on the way,

walking together, supporting each other,

the gift discovered in each day.

 

Surrounded by goodness and simplicity,

even if I feel the need for it to search,

nature, quiet, people and prayer

all signs of the path to new birth.

 

The adventure continues to unfold,

I ask, ‘What is next, dear Lord?’

‘Trust in me,’ is God’s response,

and so I say again, ‘yes, my Lord!’

 

Blessed indeed is the way

that Saint Francis chose to walk,

I choose to follow in this path

and know it becomes my pace and talk.

 

Most High and Generous God,

Your awesomeness is all around,

this time has been truly graced,

and I do indeed feel princely crowned.

Rejoice in hope, be patient in tribulation, be constant in prayer.

– Romans 12.12

There is a Flame

There is a flame that is burning within my soul,
It is calling me to dance,
It is calling me to life,
It is calling me to trust. 

There is a flame that is burning within my soul,

It is making the gospel come to life,
It is making the words of Christ real,
It is making the journey unfold.

There is a flame that is burning within my soul,
It is lighting the path,
It is lighting the darkness,
It is lighting the way of truth.

There is a flame that is burning within my soul,

It is the same one that engulfed Francis,
It is the same one that engulfed Clare,
It is the same one that engulfs the Franciscan family.

There is a flame that is burning within my soul,

It is wrapping me in light with courage and strength,
It is opening me up to hope, joy and promise,
It is encouraging me to persevere and love.

There is a flame that is burning within my soul,

It is at the very heart of me,
It is God at work in me,
It is Christ walking with me,
It is the Spirit stirring within me.

There is a flame that is burning within my soul,

It says come and follow me,
And I do so each day,
As I walk deeper with Saint Francis
By embracing the Gospel of Christ.

 My heart is ready God, my heart is ready!

 

 

Over the past week as I continue to wait for visa issues to get handled (they are much closer) I have been on a second retreat. The Journey Towards Center, the Place of Heart was our theme. While my Brother Novices journeyed on retreat at our Novitiate House, I journeyed here at our Retreat Center in Western Canada. It was a good week: a mix of quiet, prayer, reflection, daily chores, and being part of the community here and at the Novitiate (thank goodness for Skype).

Sunrise - last week of August

 

The beauty of journeying towards the center of who we are, is that we encounter Christ there. Francis himself journeyed to his center and profoundly encounter Christ. It was good for me to be able to enter this journey and encounter a small portion of what Francis discovered. Throughout the week the line, ‘My heart is ready God, my heart is ready!’ kept playing through me over and over again. I see it as an anthem of what this Novitiate Year is continually unfolding for us Novices. I see it as the anthem of my prayer life deepening and my relationship with Christ engulfing me. I see it as the anthem that captured the life of Francis and Clare and that stirs within me.

The poem I opened with, is one I wrote this spring, it seems to best describe this past week for me. I wrote it during my hermitage, it seemed unfinished when I wrote it, until I read it at the end of this week. It is amazing to me how the journey continues to intertwine and draw me in more and more. Christ definitely continues to enflame my center.

 

 

In God we move and have our being

for we are spouses, parents, siblings of Christ,

and because of this we are dwelling places of

holiness and hope,

we are temples of prayer

and the gospel brought to life!

 

My heart is ready God, my heart is ready

and Your flame burns more brightly deep within my soul.

Sacred Sunday Evening

As Sunday comes to a close and I reflect back on my day I look back with a grateful heart. Our world is hurting in so many places and I was gifted with a peaceful day to contemplate God’s goodness in my life.

As I look back on my day and my Sunday Morning Coming Down blog I realize that the gift of the Eucharist is what makes my Sundays sacred. Whether I attend Mass on Saturday night or on Sunday Morning it is the gift of the Eucharist that is my nourishment which feeds me and sustains me. Jesus himself, present for me and for all. Jesus himself, my strength for busy week days and Sundays. Jesus himself, my rest for Sabbath Sundays and quiet moments in the week. Jesus himself, my hope when the world seems so shattered and torn. Jesus himself, my peace that conquers all hate and evil.

Yes Sundays are sacred in my world, always have been, always will be. Whether it’s brunch with family or friars or friends after Mass, whether it is sleeping in because of Saturday night Mass, whether it is an early morning walk, whether it is quiet moments with a cup of tea gazing out at the world, whether it's naps or visits in the afternoon, whether it's a movie or a walk in the evening, whether it's leftovers or tablecloth meals, Jesus is present.

What more do I need to make Sundays sacred?

Emmanuel – God with us

Jesus the Bread of Life and Cup of Salvation

Our Savior, Brother and Friend
present in the sacredness of Sunday and each day.

 

Have a blessed week.

I hope your Sundays to come are sacred ones!

Sunday Morning Coming Down

One of my favorite Johnny Cash songs is Sunday Morning Coming Down. Although the song is not necessarily about a positive Sunday morning, the lines ‘Cause there’s something in a Sunday… and Sunday morning coming down’ have always called me to appreciate the gift of Sunday mornings!

I have always loved Sunday mornings, whether after a busy Saturday or a quiet one, whether the week ending was busy or spent in retreat, whether I’m at home, or on the road, Sunday morning calls me into an awareness. For whatever reason, God feels closer on a Sunday morning. There is just something sacred about a Sunday Morning.

As I journey more deeply into the Franciscan way of life, I come to appreciate Sunday mornings even more. The sacred silence, that allows me to rest in Christ.  The quiet time of prayer, that centers my day and week. The time to ponder and reflect, that reveals what God is stirring in my heart.

It is in the sacredness of Sunday morning that I begin this week. I am still waiting for my Visa to be worked out but I have hope that it will be this week. So I begin this week at our Retreat Center, at the end of a full week of Retreat with my Brother Friars. It was a good retreat, really a gift for me, since my plans changed. It was such a blessing to be nourished and filled up. It was such a blessing to celebrate with my community and see all the Brothers from our Province. It was such a blessing to spend time with our new Postulants, to reflect back on where I was a year ago, and to encourage them for the journey ahead. It was such a blessing to be welcomed into my Novice Year and begin my life as a Brother here.  It was such a blessing to begin my Novice Year right away by leading prayer, and taking on ‘household chores’ (Yes Mom, that even included cleaning the bathrooms!). It is a blessing to be here with the six Brothers that make up the community here, they have been kind and welcoming and make me feel at home.

 

 

It is in the sacredness of Sunday morning, that I look ahead to this week. I will spend some time in continued retreat. My Novice Brothers are beginning retreat this week. My director at the Novitiate has been very kind to send me the outline and so I will be connected with them through prayer, quiet and similar routine. I have much to reflect on from last week’s retreat and now even more to journey deeper. Another blessing indeed.

It is in the sacredness of Sunday morning, that I reflect back to a year ago today that began my Postulant Year. Wow! What a year indeed! So many blessings, so much growth, such deepening of the journey of faith, so many opportunities, so many people that I am grateful for and such gratitude for God’s graces poured into my life. A whole year has slipped by and now I’m into my second year of this Franciscan journey. This second year in some sense is a first year, as my life within the Order began this past week. I know that this year will also slip by and before you know it I will be a simply professed Friar.

So in the sacredness of this Sunday morning, I give thanks to God again for the gift of life, for this awesome journey and for the joy that fills my heart in being a Brother in the Order of Friars Minor!

Your steadfast love endures forever, O Lord,

It fills my life and guides my journey.

Praise be you my Lord and my God!

An Unexpected Change of Plans but Full of Blessings

My Brother, what do you ask of us?

Moved by divine inspiration, I wish to share your life in the brotherhood of the Order of Friars Minor. I ask to be admitted to your way of life that I may be tested and learn how to take on my shoulders the yoke of the Lord in love and joy. I ask to join following the example of St. Francis of Assisi, the humble servant of the Lord.

Thanks be to God! Your life in the Order of Friars Minor begins today.

 

 

This is the question I was asked, the statement I declared and the response of the community of Friars that officially begins my Novitiate Year.

A few days delayed, still in Canada, but still it’s all good!

I was received into the Order of Friars Minor with the community of brothers around me that form the brotherhood in Western Canada. Something unique from the rest of my Novice brothers. Something that I will treasure and cherish.

We continue on this week in retreat, and hopeful that all Visa issues will be resolved by weeks end.

I now am called to embrace the traditions, the mission, the fraternity and service in a concrete way but with a continued openness and willingness.  I humbly walk in the footsteps of St. Francis in the name of Christ Jesus.

I pray that I may continue to joyful reflect Christ always.

 

Almighty, eternal, just and merciful God,

Grant us in our day the grace

To do for You alone

What we know You want us to do,

And always to desire what pleases You.

-          From Opening Prayer of the Retreat

 

 

It's All Good - Part 2: Roadblock

The start to my Novitiate have had a slight change of plans…

 

My Visa did not arrive, but I still flew out today in hopes I would be allowed to enter as a visitor. That did not happen which meant I got deported from the USA after arriving in Minneapolis.(The kicker is my Brother Mathieu from Quebec was allowed to enter.) 

I was forced (if you will) to fly back to Regina and will now fly to Calgary and meet up with the Western Canadian Friars (my community).

We begin our annual retreat on Monday. I will be received into the Novitiate by our Provincial then and will remain with my community somewhere in Alberta (Cochrane or Edmonton) until my Visa comes through and I can enter the USA again.

It’s all good, well besides the fact that I now have a record with US Immigration.

The Immigration Officer was actually very good and funny, they even tried to make it happen.

My advice… always have the paperwork done or know all details.

It’s all good, my boxes I shipped arrived today at the Novitiate House and I still get to begin my Novitiate Year and will eventually join my brothers at the Novitiate House!

I’m still smiling and still excited!

Still need prayers!

It’s still all good!

St. Francis… St. Clare… St. Christopher… St. Michael…. pray for me!

 

This may be the final post now for the year.. I guess we will see!

It's All Good!

It’s All Good!

Well my time for summer holidays has come to a close and it’s time to head off to my Novitiate Year!

It’s All Good!

I had a very full time at home with family and friends, visits, gatherings, walks, special moments and celebrations!

It’s All Good!

Our family celebrated Christmas & Easter and enjoyed a family bonfire – what great times, traditions, good food, celebrating our Savior and aware of the gifts of the seasons and families. Loved going for walks with each of my nephews and nieces!

It’s All Good!

I have great friends who have opened their doors, hosted gatherings, ran errands, given hugs and understood when plans changed.

It’s All Good!

I am off to meet up with 14 amazing men, who I will journey with as brothers and we will deepen our walk with St. Francis.

It’s All Good!

God continues to bless my life and my journey! I feel so rich for someone who is walking into a deeper path of poverty.

It’s All Good!

The journey continues and I feel very blessed. I have been filled up and fueled and embraced with big hugs! I think I’m actually ready for this! I’m excited for the year ahead!

It’s All Good!

Thank you for journeying with me on this blog.

My blog will be silent now until August 2015 as I enter into a more contemplative year and step away from demands so I can enter more fully into this Franciscan journey.

I humbly ask for your prayers in this year ahead.

It’s All Good!

 

Home is where we can

laugh and cry,

embrace and dance,

sleep long and dream quietly;

eat, read, play, watch the fire,

listen to music and

be with a friend.

Home is a place where we can

rest and be healed.

- Henri Nouwen

 

Home for me will always be Saskatchewan with family and loved ones!

Home for me has a Franciscan hue and outlook.

 

Home for me this year is my Novitiate Year House and It’s All Good!

Keep Calm Claim Identity

            As my summer holidays come to a close and I look ahead to travel and settling into the Novitiate (in 1 week), a lot has been crossing my mind. How to manage my time left with family and friends, how to pack more efficiently and how to let go of (or crush) the little bit of fear that tries to creep in and take over this amazing journey. As these thoughts swirl through my mind and I try to stay on top of plans, details and being present to enjoy the moments I keep coming back to an essay by Sr. Ilia Delio I read and reflected on this summer while at Summer School.

            Reading this essay helped provide even more words to my own discernment and why I was open to entering religious life. In a world that is obsessed with self-image, “keeping up with the Jones” and fretting about identity theft; this essay reminded me that I am created in the image of God and am called to build relationships. Being created in the image of God and being aware of his relationship with God in the world around him is what St. Francis discovered over and over again in his own journey.  Through the encounters with the lepers and the minorities of society, his quiet prayer time, his interaction with creation, the stigmata and his deep desire to live out the Gospel he embodied the gift of being in relationship with God, with Christ and the Holy Spirit. It is in my own life that relationships, community, encounters with creation and the quiet of prayer that have deepened my awareness of being created in God’s image and how my life is a deepening relationship with the Trinity. As Sr. Ilia says, “in Christ one discovers the truth of one’s identity.”

            It is in discovering and embracing this Christ identity that Francis envisioned and lived out, as Fr. Michael Cusato, O.F.M. would describe, the “universal fraternity of creation.”  This “universal fraternity of creation” became evident in Francis and deepened his Christ-like identity as he lived with his brothers, embraced being a minor, through his being open to the grace of God and in identifying with the “truly suffering human beings”. Sr. Ilia points out that Francis’ “radical renunciation (abandonment) for the love of God…following the poor and humble Christ…and the realization of God’s presence in the world” became his life lived in a truly theological (spiritual/divine) way. I was encouraged with these reminders. They speak to me about my identity in the bigger picture of being part of a community. They speak to me about how my encounters with Christ in others, in creation and in prayer call me to serve, minister and live for those who are viewed as minors in our world.

These points have seemed to strike a chord in my heart and my discernment. The reality of “universal fraternity” speaks to my compassionate and generous side. There is a desire more and more to serve my brothers and sisters that are suffering, hurting or simply seeking respect and dignity. The “renunciation for the love of God” challenges me to deepen my trust in God working in my life and to allow God’s love to transform me. In “following the poor and humble Christ” I am called to preach the Good News with my life. Through my actions, my words, my prayers, and my serving I should reflect Christ who always humbly pointed to God and who always sought out the lost, the hurting and the poor. This also challenges me to look at how I will live out the Franciscan organizing value of minority.  Finally the “realization of God’s presence in the world” calls me to be aware each day of the blessings that fill my day. It also calls me to be aware that blessings and God’s presence may be in places that I least expect. It is in identifying my own life as theological, like Francis’ was, that I can truly live out my Franciscan vocation.

Living out my Franciscan vocation speaks to me about my identity. This true self that has always been at my core and in my heart is brought to the forefront and exposed to the goodness of God in my life. I discover more and more on this journey that I was created for this. That my “original identity” blending with my authentic Christ identity is truly a “coming home”. I see how my self-identity, my family of origin and their influence, the community in which I grew up in and the life I led before entering the Franciscans was indeed preparing me to claim my identity more fully. My personality, my gifts, skills and my uniqueness however limited or frail they are, are called forth in community and in turn they contribute to the community. With my fellow brothers sharing their personality, gifts and skills, together we strengthen our Franciscan community, serve those who are lesser in a greater way and welcome all in the awesome homecoming that we each desire and deserve.

This identity claiming, if you will, this value for relationship is obvious in the life of Francis and the early community. We see men coming to Francis and then together forming a community, discovering how to support and challenge each other, living for the minority and growing more deeply in their radical way of following the humble and crucified Christ. Again I see how my journey points back to Francis which in turn points me to Christ, the Holy Spirit at work and the goodness of God.

Being a follower of Christ in the footsteps of St. Francis can be a challenging way to live but I must remember that my identity in Christ is strength for the journey. I must keep at the forefront the goodness of God revealed in relationships with creation, fellow human beings and our Crucified Savior. To immerse myself in this goodness is to claim my true identity and embrace being a Franciscan.

 

 

Treasures in the Journey

  This past weekend I had the great privilege and honor to be back at Resurrection Parish (where I ministered for six years). It was great to be home and celebrate with this vibrant community. I had the great opportunity to share with the community about my journey this past year. The scripture readings for the weekend served as my guide. What follows is my reflection.

God my God, You I crave my soul thirsts for you like a dry and weary land.

God said (to Solomon) “ask something of me and I will give it to you.”

God my God, You I crave my soul thirsts for you like a dry and weary land.

“Give your servant, an understanding heart”

God my God, You I crave my soul thirsts for you like a dry and weary land.

“Lord, let your kindness comfort me for I love your commands more than gold.”

God my God, You I crave my soul thirsts for you like a dry and weary land.

 “All things work for good for those who love God and are called according to his purpose.”

God my God, You I crave my soul thirsts for you like a dry and weary land.

“The kingdom of heaven is like a treasure.”

God my God, You I crave my soul thirsts for you like a dry and weary land.

In the journey of life we discover the treasures God has buried in our life. You just never know where you are going to discover them and how they will lead you closer to God. I have been pondering the treasure of baptism, of the Eucharist, and of reconciliation. I have been pondering the treasure of family and friends. I have been pondering the treasure of community, fraternity and minority. I have been pondering the treasure of the vows of poverty, chastity and obedience. I have been pondering the treasure of the gift of St. Francis and his deep relationship with Christ.

All those treasures have been running through my mind as I prepared to come home and celebrate here and as I reflected on my year past and year ahead.

When we discussed the possibility of my being here for a weekend it never crossed my mind to flip through the Lectionary to look at the scripture. Well I must say that our God is a good and gracious God and our God has a great sense of humor for when I read for the first time the readings we just heard, I laughed out loud and said, ‘really God, okay I get it. You are speaking to me again very clearly.  I’ll listen a bit more closely.’ J In pondering, listening and reflecting I would like to share with you these treasures that today’s scripture have inspired as I share with you a bit about my journey.

I chose to begin at the baptismal font and journey forward because my craving for God that was ignited in baptism those 37 years ago has propelled me forward into a deepening relationship and journey with God. Each time I place my hand in that font I am reminded that God satisfies all my cravings that my life is a journey full of faith, of great treasures and my cup does indeed overflow.

When I read from Kings I saw a parallel to my own journey. God telling Solomon to ask something of God is similar to how my journey to the Franciscans began. In early January 2012 while in prayer I was reflecting on the New Year ahead, a phrase from a reflection kept running through my head… ‘Do something new in me Lord.’ It was in that time of prayer that like for Solomon God was very near and said to me, ask of me. So I did, I prayed ‘do something new in me Lord, I am yours, I trust in you and so I give you permission to do something new in me.’ Well my friends, if you haven’t caught on be careful for what you ask of God, because my something new has lead me to the path of St. Francis and the Franciscans and I didn’t see that one coming at all. J

            A year ago this weekend we gathered in this space for the first time (wow!), a treasure indeed, the Mass that weekend was my last official task as Pastoral Assistant here at Resurrection. The chaos of that last week, the blessings in my farewell, the first Masses and the prayers of this parish and my family have encouraged me over this past year in trusting God more and in journeying deeper with Christ. Like Solomon’s prayer, “give your servant, an understanding heart” those words have been my prayer over this past year. I prayed help me understand Lord, how I will live through this year away from my supports and comforts and familiarity. Help me understand Lord, how to walk this path and how to trust more. Help me understand Lord, how to serve in new ways, how to respond to this calling, how to embrace the gifts of being a lesser brother. Help me understand Lord, how the charism of St. Francis is infusing my life and how I’m called to live it out. (and this still is my prayer)

            As my Postulancy Year now comes to a close I see how my heart has opened up, how the gift of understanding has taken root and how I need to continue to nurture it.

I reflect back on a year that including moving to Victoria, living in community, studying, coming to understand Francis a bit more, learning the depth of brotherhood, deepening my prayer life, being challenged to share my gifts, explore my gifts in new ways and continue to be open to God doing something new in me over and over again.  The year sailed by very quickly and now here I stand again on a threshold of the next step on the journey.

            I find myself craving God’s awesome plan more and more. I find myself surrounded by support and prayer. As the letter to the Romans says, I find myself as did Francis desiring “to be conformed to the image of the Son”.  In saying these words aloud I have to smile for I can only imagine how God will shape them in my journey ahead as being conformed to the image of Christ has a lot to do with God doing something new in me (and each of us). J     

Today I look around and I see a community that desires and strives to be the image of the Risen Lord in our society, I look around and see a community that craves to have the Lord work in them, I look around and see fellow believers on the journey, renewed by the Font of Life, nourished by the Banquet of the Lord, I look around and see fellow believers who are people of prayer and service that continue to inspire and support my journey. I am grateful for the continued prayers and support of this community. (I don’t know if I can express my deepest gratitude knowing that you have held me in prayer.) It is the treasures of your prayers and support that help me and others to look forward to the year ahead.

            The treasure of my Novitiate Year begins on August 15, I will travel to Burlington Wisconsin to meet up with my 14 Postulant Brothers. We will be received into the Franciscan family on the Feast of the Assumption of Mary. We will live and journey together with our 4 Formators for the next 50 weeks. Yes that is 19 men living together for nearly 1 year under 1 roof. Thank you Jesus it is a big house! J The year will be, if you will, an intense retreat year. A routine of prayer, Franciscan learning, community events, personal growth, a deeper opening of my heart, and a deepening of God doing something new in my life will guide the Novitiate Year. It will be a full year away (without coming home, without a cellphone or a weekly blog) but a year I am very much looking forward to. Today I humbly stand before you and ask for your prayers and support not only for me, but also for my brothers and our Formators. My brothers (whom I’ve been away at summer school with) come from all walks of life and backgrounds from coast to coast of the US, from El Salvador, Mexico, Iraq, Ireland and from Quebec. My brothers come to this journey from roles as students, in the film industry, a police officer, a manager at Walmart, in the business field, and world travels. Together we have begun to form a brotherhood, where we are learning to trust each other, challenge each other and discovering who can cook, who cleans up after themselves and who will make it to prayer on time. J Our Formators come from 4 different Franciscan provinces and have all each been friars for over 20 years. It will be a very interesting and graced filled year to treasure.

My Postulant Director called the Novitiate Year a year of Summer Camp. I can attest that after 4 weeks, summer camp is enough, so I know for sure that a year of summer camp is way too much. Like I said I prefer Intense Retreat! J No matter what the year is or how it turns out, by the grace of God, I will continue to be open to conform my life to Christ, and my heart will be filled with deeper understanding, courage, a fuller embracing of the charism of St. Francis and many moments to treasure. And by the grace of God, I will come back home next August in a brown Franciscan habit as simply professed Franciscan Friar. With God all things are possible!

            From the font… to a life journey and now wrapped in a Franciscan journey that includes asking something of God, to desiring to be a servant with an understanding heart, to being open to God’s will according to God’s purpose, to embracing the journey as a treasure that will lead to the kingdom of heaven, I say here I am Lord, I come to do your will. In the words of St. Francis, ‘if God can work through me, God can work through anyone.’ Each of us are called, no matter our age, God simply says to us… ask me. So today as we come forward to receive nourishment from the Banquet of the Lord, let us allow ourselves to be consumed by Christ and as we take leave of the church and place our hand in the font let us remember the treasure of the kingdom of God is ours to behold.

            I invite you to trust in our loving God and dare you to pray for something new to happen in your life.  I invite you to pray with me the prayer that St. Francis prayed before the crucifix…

Most High,

Glorious God,

Enlighten the darkness of my heart

And give me true faith,

Certain hope and perfect charity,

Sense and knowledge, Lord,

That I may carry out

Your holy and true command.

Amen.

 

God my God, You I crave my soul thirsts for you like a dry and weary land.